How to begin this post. I am at a loss. For those of you who know me personally, you know that I am not usually at a loss for words but tonight I just am. I have been putting off this blog post hoping that I wouldn’t have to face reality. That maybe if I just kept it out of cyberspace then it wouldn’t be real. However, cyberspace or not, it is true. Tears are thick in my eyes, welling up and flowing without care of how they are making my mascara run. (If tears had a gender they would obviously be male. No regard for the importance of mascara. Just an observation.) Now, for those of you that are grabbing your phone to be a good friend and call me to make sure I’m alright, I must clarify. These aren’t tears of sadness…at least not entirely. They are tears of so many emotions all jumbled up inside of little me. That really is probably the best way to describe the last few months of life for Mary Powell. Emotional. Yet so very sweet. Sweet because in the midst of the emotion, the change, the decision-making, the leaps of faith, I have been reminded of my one constant. The thing that is not emotional. Never changing. Promised. Secure. Safe.
It is He who has lead me to this place of emotion and for good reason. You see, He has called me to obedience. Obedience that requires sacrifice. Obedience that has room for gain. Obedience that has a cost. Obedience that has a reward. Over the last few months, the Lord has made it very clear to me, in a way only He could, that it was time for a new adventure. One that would be uncomfortable. Uncertain. That would ask something of me that I don’t usually like to associate with myself. Risk. A word whose role in my life would be better left to playing the board game a few times a year. Or once for that matter. Yet, He works in funny ways that always seem to involve putting us in situations that we don’t like, just so that we will be forced to trust Him. Clever He is. So here, I find myself. With an opportunity to see how He would bless bold obedience.
After 2 years of working for Christian sports camp ministry and over 3 years living in Missouri, God has pointed my feet in a new direction, asking me to trust Him as I leave what I have come to know as home. I have tried to reason my way out of it or negotiate the timing, but as Craig Groeschel says so poignantly, “Delayed obedience is disobedience and partial obedience is disobedience.” So, I step out in faith, trusting that obedience brings blessing. The kind of blessing that can only come from a Constant.
Tears are still welling up in my eyes, messing up my mascara, but they are sweet tears. Tears that sadly represent a closing of a chapter of life that has been richer than the wealthiest man could ever dream. Full of friendships, growth, challenge and joy. In a perfectly reconcilable way, they are also tears that welcome the excitement of a new chapter, one that is undoubtedly filled with God’s richest blessings. Blessings that will make the risk well worth it.
When I first moved to Missouri over three years ago, I was finally starting to dabble in photography, my long time passion. I did a series of ‘biblical truths’ from life around me (mostly things I found on kamp property). I stumbled across this today and thought it was fitting as I leave and ironic as it was taken when this chapter started. Little did I know.
This was the verse I had used, 3 years ago, to describe it. Deuteronomy 28:1-3- If you fully obey the LORD your God and carefully follow all his commands I give you today, the LORD your God will set you high above all the nations on earth. All these blessings will come upon you and accompany you if you obey the LORD your God: You will be blessed in the city and blessed in the country.
Stay tuned for tomorrow’s post to find out where I’m going! Happy Tuesday!